Circle Star Page 10

  Back to Contents

  Chapter Eight

  Susanna leaned back in the padded seat of the buggy, enjoying the heat of the morning sun. A flock of tiny birds flew up from the desert scrub, their chirps mixing with the clatter of the horse’s hooves. She adjusted her grip on the reins, lifted her chin, took a deep breath and exhaled it again slowly, letting the tension drain out of her body.

  It had been a good idea to stay the night in Cedar City after she and Pete Jackson had taken care of recording her marriage. Pete might have preferred to hurry back to the ranch, instead of suffering through a theater show with her, but she had been desperate for a distraction.

  The stream of well wishers during the interval had delighted her. Burt Hartman had been particularly solicitous. The low lights in the theater had softened his pale skin and angular features. Once again, Susanna had considered him a handsome man.

  It no longer mattered if Connor left. From now on, she would put him out of her mind and concentrate on running Circle Star. The burden of her responsibilities would be tempered by consultations with advisors, who would treat her with respect and admiration, as befitted a lone woman in charge of an important enterprise.

  And, best of all, soon she might get a visit from Claire. She’d received reply to her letter and knew Claire was working on getting permission from her parents. No doubt she would succeed. Beautiful, clever and full of good humor, Claire was one of those rare people to whom people always said yes.

  Susanna tugged at the reins, slowing the horse to a walk. The stack of parcels beside her teetered, and she reached out one gloved hand to steady them. She couldn’t wait to hear Claire’s laughter when her friend tried on the clothes and gun belt Susanna had bought for her.

  Of course, Claire didn’t know how to shoot, and Susanna would have to insist the gun remain unloaded until she learned, but she knew that Claire wouldn’t be satisfied with her new outfit unless it included a revolver bouncing at her hip.

  Susanna smiled, cherishing her secret. She hadn’t told anyone about Claire’s visit. That way, if her friend couldn’t come, the disappointment wouldn’t be sharpened by having to field well meaning inquiries about when she was expected to arrive.

  “I guess it was worth getting bored for three hours in that theatre to see you smile,” Pete grumbled from horseback beside the buggy.

  “Yes,” Susanna replied, feeling serene for the first time in weeks.

  “Are you going to stop giving whiskey to the boy?” Pete pressed.

  “I’m not giving it to him.” Susanna’s tone was firm. “He fetches a new bottle from the pantry every time he leaves his room. As far as I’m concerned, he can do whatever he wishes. I don’t care anymore. My father shouldn’t have forced me to marry him.”

  Pete snorted and spat on the ground. Then he kicked his roan gelding into a canter, leaving Susanna to arrive at Circle Star unescorted, except for a cloud of dust. She gathered the parcels in her arms and climbed down from the buggy. Gomez, the young wrangler in charge of the stables, sauntered over to take care of the horse.

  A small thread of worry tightened inside Susanna as she entered the hall and started up the stairs. Pete was getting bold with his disapproval of her. She had to do something about his hostility, but she didn’t quite know what.

  The door to her father’s bedroom stood open. Susanna’s heart jolted. She eased closer and peeked inside. Carmen was bustling by the empty bed, shaking out a clean sheet that billowed high in the air before fluttering down over the mattress. The stacks of dirty plates had been cleared away and a fresh breeze blew in through the open window.

  “Connor?” Susanna managed the single word in a low murmur.

  Carmen beamed at her. “Señor Connor ask me to clean the room.”

  “Where is he?” Susanna raked her gaze past the heavy oak furniture, as though she might find him hiding in some recess.

  “Señor Connor ride out with two men,” Carmen explained with a surly glance in her direction.

  Susanna stepped into the room. “When? Where to?”

  “I don’t know.” Carmen turned away and carried on making the bed. “This morning.”

  “Did he say when he’ll be back?”

  Carmen avoided looking at her. “I don’t know. He leave no message for you.”

  Susanna retreated through the open door and continued down the hall to her own bedroom. Her brows drew into a frown. She had sensed a growing hostility from Pete, and now Carmen had joined in. Why was everybody blaming her? If Connor was intent on drowning himself in alcohol, it wasn’t her responsibility to stop him.

  Or was it?

  Susanna collapsed to sit on the edge of the bed, the parcels scattering to the floor. Did Carmen and Pete think she wanted Connor to die? Her chest tightened until she could no longer breathe. Had she hoped to be rid of the hard and bitter man, so she could cling to the memory of the kind and gentle boy she had once loved?

  Anxiety propelled her to her feet. Not stopping to change out of her dress, she ran down the stairs and across the yard to the stables, where Gomez was busy dealing with the buggy and the horse.

  Susanna came to an abrupt halt. What could she say? Ask a hired hand if he knew where her husband had gone? She passed him in silence and entered the shady stables. Connor’s stallion was gone, as was his saddle. Most of the other stalls were empty, giving her no clue as to which two of the ranch hands had accompanied him.

  Behind her came the tingling of spurs, together with muffled footsteps. Susanna whirled back toward the entrance. A dark silhouette stood against the light. A tiny cry of alarm burst from her throat and rippled into the shadows.

  “Pardon me, Mrs. McGregor. I didn’t mean to startle you.” The young ranch hand led the buggy horse into the stable and came to a stop in front of an empty stall.

  “Do you know where he’s gone?” Susanna asked. The word ‘husband’ simply refused to form on her lips.

  “He’s gone to the north ridge to see where your father died. Garrett and Ramirez rode with him.”

  The north ridge was not very far, about an hour’s ride away. Susanna tried to sound casual. “Did they say if they plan to return in time for dinner?”

  Gomez finished taking the bridle off the horse, came out and slid the iron bolt on the stall door. He eyed her with what she recognized as pity. “They took shovels, and food for several days. The boss said he wants to finish the job on the new well.”

  “I see.” Susanna clasped her fingers together until she thought the delicate bones might snap, “Thank you,” she added, forcing out the words.

  “Ma’am.” Gomez touched the brim of his hat.

  Susanna nodded at him, turned and fled past him back toward the house.

  Two things were clear to her. First, the men knew she had married Connor. Instantly, she had changed from ‘Miss Susanna’ to ‘Mrs. McGregor’. Second, she could forget about her plan of running the ranch. It was a man’s world, and just like when her father was alive, she’d already been pushed into the background.

  In less than forty-eight hours after their hasty wedding, Connor was already The Boss. No one, including Pete and Carmen, presumed her husband was in any way accountable to her for his actions. And Connor had made it clear that he would do exactly as he pleased. He hadn’t even bothered to let her know that he had ridden out for several days.

  Susanna’s boots clapped an angry cadence against the timber as she raced up the stairs and hurried past the room where Carmen was now busy scrubbing the floor. What was the point of planning, when as soon as a man stepped into the picture, her plans became obsolete? Everyone expected her to stand back like a meek little wife and let Connor take over.

  Well… They would just have to see about that.

  ****

  Each night, Susanna went to bed early, her heart beating erratically at the prospect that Connor might ride home after dark. Every morning, she woke up with a confusing mix of relief and disappointment.

&nb
sp; The days dragged. She continued to wear her working clothes, although with the men no longer on the road searching for Connor there was no need for her to take on ranch chores. She tried to join Carmen in the kitchen, but found she didn’t enjoy the tasks. Worse, she got in the way. As the strain between them grew, Susanna gave up the effort and told Carmen to ask around for two maids, one to do the cleaning and one to help in the kitchen.

  She spent her time reading, or riding out alone. It was considered improper for a lady to roam the desert unescorted, but Susanna flaunted the convention. She had tried tagging along with the teams of ranch hands as they rode the fence line or searched for strays, but she sensed the men resented her presence since it forced them to curb their language and manners.

  In the evenings, propelled by some restless instinct, Susanna changed into a gown, favoring the gray silk she’d worn when she found Connor in El Paso. She sat alone in the big dining room, in the place she had occupied as a girl, and picked at the food Carmen had prepared.

  Nine days after Connor had ridden out to the north ridge a commotion in the kitchen interrupted the tedium of the evening. Susanna had barely sat down for dinner. The hot day was turning into a cold night, with an unusual bite to the wind, strong enough to rattle the shutters over the windows.

  When raucous shouts and laughter erupted from the kitchen, Susanna got up and drifted over. She longed for conversation and wished she could join the men as they dined in shifts, but she knew they would dislike the formality her company would bring.

  The kitchen door stood open. Spicy smells and the soar of masculine voices spilled out into the hall. Susanna eased closer. Her satin slippers made no sound as she stepped across the threshold. It took a while before anyone noticed her arrival, which gave her ample time to take in the scene.

  Connor reigned at the center of a knot of men gathered between the long table and the back entrance. He was clutching the arms of a voluptuous dark girl who stood facing him. A chorus of encouragement burst all around him. He gave the men a quick grin, then bent his head and pressed a solid kiss on the girl’s pouting mouth.

  The surge of hurt was so overpowering Susanna felt as though she were drowning. Her head felt light. No air passed into her lungs. Dimly she became aware that one of the men had glanced in her direction. He poked his elbow into the side of the man next to him and spoke a few words.

  Like wildfire, the news spread, until most of the men had turned to stare at her. Connor was the last to react. His eyes narrowed into watchful slits.

  “Please don’t let me interrupt,” Susanna said, finding her voice, and mercifully managing to keep it strong and steady. She turned to go.

  “Wait,” Connor called out after her. “You’ll need to get introduced. This is Miranda, the new maid.”

  Susanna ignored him. She raced upstairs. Tears of humiliation stung in her eyes. She’d been put in her place regarding the running of the ranch, but was she not to have any say even in decisions usually left to the lady of the house, such as selecting maids? Her anger rose as that bold kiss grew to more in her mind. How dare Connor bring some slut into the house and flaunt her in front of the men like that?

  She had accepted the possibility that their relationship might be strained, at least in the beginning. It would take time to establish a trust that would eventually allow for some level of harmony. She’d even come to terms that their marriage might remain a union in name only.

  But never in her worst nightmares had she considered the possibility that Connor would simply ignore her as his wife and install a mistress right here on Circle Star.

  Susanna locked her door and dragged out a chair to make a barricade against any attempt to enter. She lay awake for hours, alert and listening. Her efforts were in vain.

  No footsteps approached her room.

  No knock sounded on her door.

  The handle never rattled

  ****

  Susanna lingered in her bedroom until she could be sure that Connor had finished his breakfast. When she went downstairs, she found the food set out on the dining table untouched. She waited, sipping coffee and nibbling on a piece of toast. When Carmen came to clear the dishes away, Susanna learned that Connor had eaten in the kitchen with the men.

  She forced a casual tone. “I hear we have a new maid. Where did you find the girl?”

  “I don’t find her,” Carmen replied. “Ramirez have a girl in Cedar City. Señor Connor tell him if he want to marry, Miranda can have job at Circle Star.”

  Susanna’s brows drew together. “That girl is going to marry Ramirez?”

  Carmen beamed. “They already marry, yesterday in Cedar City. Last night we celebrate. You not hear noise in the kitchen?”

  “I heard the noise,” Susanna said stiffly.

  “You no join in?” Carmen clucked her tongue. “You miss all fun.”

  Susanna looked away. “I didn’t think I was invited,” she muttered, more to herself than to Carmen. Then she dug deep for her dignity and asked, “Is Miranda going to work in the kitchen or do the cleaning?”

  “Cleaning, I think. She is strong girl.” Carmen pursed her lips, looking awkward. “Of course, if Señora agree.”

  Susanna managed a ghost of a smile. “Fine,” she said. “As long as you can manage in the kitchen until you find another girl. Could you send Miranda in, so I can meet her?”

  Carmen picked up the untouched platters of eggs and ham. “Miranda is getting her things from Cedar City. She is back this afternoon.”

  Susanna nodded, grateful for the reprieve. She would try her best to be pleasant to the girl, who had done nothing wrong except follow the tradition of receiving a wedding kiss from her new husband’s boss. It wasn’t the poor girl’s fault that the boss had yet to kiss his own wife.

  ****

  Restless, struggling to conquer the anger and hurt that niggled in her gut, just like the sting from an insect bite lingers on the skin, Susanna sat down in the library and spent two hours writing another letter to Clair—a little more candid this time, begging her to come. She decided to ride to Cedar City and post the letter at once. Eager to find some purpose for her day, she headed out to the stables.

  Gomez was crossing the yard, leading a pair of yearlings.

  Susanna halted to let him pass. “When did those arrive?”

  The young wrangler greeted her with a nod. “They were delivered this morning. Six in all.”

  “Are they what Pete Jackson bought in El Paso?”

  “I don’t know.” Gomez tugged at the lead ropes to bring the animals to a stop. “The boss checked them. He only picked six out of the ten and sent the rest back.”

  “Is someone waiting for payment?” Susanna glanced around the quiet stable yard. Perhaps the men who had delivered the horses were in the kitchen, getting something to eat.

  “The boss already paid. He went into the house to get the money.”

  Susanna felt cold fingers of fear clasp at her heart. Without a word, she spun on her heels. She raced across the yard and through the hall into the library. The strongbox nestled intact in the oak cabinet where it had always been stored. She searched the shelf behind Volume Four of Shakespeare’s Complete Works. For as long as she remembered, the strongbox key had been hidden there, and it remained in place now.

  Her hands shook as she inserted the key turned the lock. A receipt for the yearlings lay on top of the pile of money. She counted what was left and opened the account book to compare the total. Another twenty dollars was missing, but a neat entry in the ledger matched it. The expenditure was labeled ‘McGregor—personal’.

  Susanna slammed the account book shut and stared blindly at the wall. So, Connor knew where the key was kept. She’d never considered that her father might have told the boy, but evidently he had. With an angry shove, she replaced the strongbox in the oak cabinet. Was there nothing that she had the authority over in her own house anymore?

  She closed the library door with a furious bang and storm
ed back to the stables. Thank heavens the law had been changed some years ago, and a woman’s property no longer passed on to her husband upon marriage. Circle Star was still legally hers, even if the practice might turn out to be different.

  “Saddle my horse,” she snapped at Gomez, who had returned from the corral for the next pair of yearlings. It was a point of pride for Susanna always to get the horse ready herself, but she was badly shaken, and she knew that she would transmit her agitation to the animal if she didn’t take a moment to calm down.

  The young ranch hand came to a halt. “You mean Santiago?”

  Susanna frowned at him. “I only have the one horse.”

  “The boss took it.” Gomez tugged at the kerchief tied around his neck, his manner awkward. “He wanted Brutus to have a rest after the hard riding yesterday.”

  A red haze of rage shimmered in front of Susanna’s eyes. Her horse. Her lovely stallion, so strong and brave, and her closest link with her father. She jerked her chin up and glared at Gomez. “Is Brutus lame?”

  “No, ma’am.” She heard the hesitation in the man’s voice and knew that he had guessed what was on her mind.

  “Saddle him,” she ordered.

  “Now, Mrs. McGregor, that horse—”

  “Saddle him,” she repeated through clenched teeth.

  The man shrugged his lean shoulders and set off to obey her command.

  “Gomez?” Susanna shouted after him.

  “Ma’am?” His tone was strained, his posture wary as he turned toward her.

  “I prefer being addressed as Miss Susanna,” she informed him. “I’d be grateful if you mentioned it to the other men.”

  “Yes, Miss Susanna,” Gomez replied. He touched the brim of his hat, whirled around once more and disappeared into the stables.